Friday, August 31, 2007

The PoPo Must Be LoCo

My morning commute was seasoned today with a Florida State Trooper on a motorcycle blasting past me and riding aggressively. Initially, I figured he was running down a speeding motorist as the State prepares for its part in the national CARE initiative ( or, perhaps he was speeding to the aid of another officer. I watched him disappear into the distance for nearly six miles (the roads are pretty straight here and those of us who ride can spot another bike for miles). Then, to my surprise, he joined a cadre of Troopers in the median (eight in all) obviously preparing to begin ruining people's days. OK, I will grant you that law enforcement does do more good than harm and I have had my share of well-deserved speeding tickets over the years. Nevertheless, it irks me to no end when law enforcement behaves in the same manner as those they will later cite.

Having waited a while for my blood to cool to a mild simmer, I ended up calling *347 and asking for the troop's shift commander. I had to leave a message - insert your own donut remark here. He called me back within the hour and I related my tale of woe. I was assured that he would "address this matter firmly" with the offending officer. He continued to offer these assurances after I asked if it was mere lip service or if, in fact, he believed that no one was above the law. Riiiigggghhhhttttt . . .

Over beers tonight, I'm sure those good ol' boys are having a hearty laugh at the bitter civilian who wished he could flash a badge and drive with immunity.

I've been around the block enough times to know that this guy was as full of methane-producing particulate as the cattle and moose I've discussed previously. So, I wrote a letter to the Troop Commander, the Director of the FHP, the local traffic court judge (she's a regular Judge Judy without the humor), and the Lt. Governor. I kinda figured Mr. Crist was too tied up kissing Awnold's Austrian arse and posturing himself for a national position. It basically captured all the elements I've mentioned here without the vitriol. Then I suggested that one of the four might try to change my cynical perspective by explaining how I am wrong in my assessments.

At the least, I killed 30 minutes of boredom and lowered my BP a few points feeling that I had at least had a small voice in something. In truth, I probably just lost thirty minutes of my life and damn near $2.00 in postage for nothing. But hey, that was 200 calories of Pepsi that I didn't get to drink. So maybe my 34s will fit another week more.

Be safe out there. Yes, even you among the Loco Popo class.

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